An introvert’s guide to networking
Tips and tricks for approaching people, starting conversations, politely exiting, and following up to make meaningful connections at networking events.
As an introvert, attending networking events can seem like a daunting experience. The thought of having to approach people and make small talk can be overwhelming, but networking is an essential part of building relationships and advancing your career. In this article, we will discuss some tips and tricks to help introverts navigate networking events and make meaningful connections.
The Roadmap
Breaking down networking events into manageable stages can make them more approachable and less daunting. That's why I think of networking events in three steps: pre-event, during, and post-event. Each stage has unique challenges and opportunities, and by preparing for each, you can make the most out of your networking experience.
STAGE 1: Pre-event
Finding the right event
With so many networking events, knowing which ones to attend can be challenging and how to make the most of them. First, it's essential to identify your networking goals. What are you hoping to achieve by attending a networking event? Are you looking to meet people in a particular industry, learn new skills, or expand your professional network? Once you clearly understand your goals, you can search for events aligning with them.
One of the best ways to find networking events is by using online resources such as Eventbrite or LinkedIn Events. These platforms list events in different cities and allow you to search for events based on your interests and goals. You can also check with professional organizations in your industry to see if they're hosting any networking events or conferences.
Another way to find networking events is by asking for recommendations. Reach out to colleagues, mentors, or friends in your industry and ask if they have any suggestions for events that may interest you. In addition, they may know of events you wouldn't have found through your research.
Dress for the occasion
Dressing for a networking event can be a tricky task. You want to make a good impression but don't want to look out of place or uncomfortable. So, what's the solution? My rule is to consider the industry and emulate the dress code accordingly.
For instance, if you're attending a startup mixer, you might opt for a more casual or smart-casual outfit. Think jeans or chinos paired with a button-up shirt or a nice blouse. On the other hand, if you're attending a banking evening, you'll likely want to dress in business-formal attire, such as a suit and tie or a professional dress.
When in doubt, it's always better to err on the side of overdressing. It shows that you take the event seriously and are willing to put in the effort to make a good impression. Plus, it's always easier to dress down a little if needed than to dress up quickly.
If you're still unsure about the dress code, don't hesitate to contact the event organizers. They can provide you with more specific guidance on what to wear, which can take a lot of the guesswork out of the equation.
Bring a friend
Having a familiar face by your side can provide a sense of comfort and security that can help you easily navigate these events. You'll feel more at ease knowing that there's someone you can rely on to have your back. Plus, having a friend with you can make the event more enjoyable overall, as you can catch up with each other in between conversations and have someone to debrief with after the event.
Use your friend's presence as a confidence boost, but challenge yourself to break away from their company and make new connections. Having a friend with you can make it easier to approach groups and start conversations, as you'll have someone to introduce you and help break the ice.
Stage 2: During the event
Approaching people
One effective way to do this is by imagining yourself as someone courageous for 20 seconds. For example, you might picture yourself as James Bond, Wonder Woman, or any other bold character you admire. Channelling their confidence can help you approach people with more ease and charisma. And once you've made the initial approach, remember to switch back to your brilliant self so they can see the real you! Just be yourself, and let the conversation flow naturally from there.
Another helpful tip is to look for open circles where people naturally invite someone to join the conversation. This is a great way to break the ice and join a conversation without feeling like you're interrupting. Finally, when you approach the group, try to introduce yourself confidently, make good eye contact and give a firm handshake. This shows that you're confident and interested in creating a connection.
Remember, networking is about building relationships, not just exchanging business cards. So, be genuine and approachable, and don't be afraid to show your personality.
Conversation Starters
Starting a conversation can be intimidating, but it doesn't have to be. Whether at a networking event or meeting new people, finding the right topic to discuss can be a challenge. That's where the HEFE acronym comes in handy. It's a simple but effective way to break the ice and get the conversation flowing naturally.
HEFE stands for Hobbies, Entertainment, Food, and Environment. These are all great topics to discuss, and they can lead to interesting conversations that help you get to know someone better. If you're unsure of where to begin, try asking open-ended questions to show your genuine interest in what they have to say.
But don't stop there. Take it a step further by using the two 'digs' rule. It involves asking a question that 'digs' another level deeper by asking a follow-up question. For instance, if you're at a networking event and you meet Jack, who tells you about his new sustainable fabrics business, ask him why he is interested in the space, what inspired him to start the business or the most challenging part of his role. This shows your interest in their story and helps you understand them better.
Remember, being an active listener is essential to engaging in a conversation. By focusing on the other person and actively listening to what they say, you can build a connection with them. So, don't be afraid to start a conversation and put the HEFE acronym and two 'digs' rule into practice. You'll be surprised at how much you can learn and how easily you can connect with people by being a good listener and showing a genuine interest in them.
Stage 3: Closing and post event
Politely Exiting
It's natural to worry about how the other person might react or whether you're coming across as rude when exiting a conversation. But here's the truth: it's okay to move on. It's healthy to recognize when a conversation has run its course, and it's time to move on to something else.
So, how can you gracefully exit a conversation without feeling awkward or guilty? The key is to have a polite and respectful exit strategy. You can use simple phrases like, "Excuse me, I need to grab a drink," or "I just noticed a friend I wanted to say hi to" to signal that you're ready to move on.
It's important to remember that whatever reason you give, you should follow through with it. So, if you say you'll grab a drink, go grab a drink! And don't forget to thank the person for their time before you leave. A simple "It was nice talking to you" or "Thanks for chatting with me" can go a long way in leaving a positive impression.
Following up
If you enjoyed the conversation, it's natural to want to chat more. Ask the other person what the best method is to stay in touch. This could be LinkedIn, Slack, Email or phone numbers. Try to read the context for the most appropriate, but you usually can't go wrong with LinkedIn.
Following up after the event is a great way to build on your connections and continue to network with people who share similar interests. When following up with someone after the event, send a personalised message referencing something you discussed or learned during your conversation. This can help make a stronger connection and show that you were genuinely interested in the conversation.
An example might be: "Hey Jack, it was wonderful meeting you the other night at the start-up mixer event. It was awesome to hear about your sustainable fabrics business, and I'd love to chat more. Would you be open to grabbing coffee?"
If all goes well, you may have another friend to attend future networking events with!
Conclusion
Networking events can be intimidating, but with the right mindset and strategies, they can be an opportunity to meet new people and advance your career. Remember, networking is not about a transactional exchange; it's about building meaningful connections with other humans.
What am I reading/listening to?
A raw and motivating insight into David Goggins’ life. A blueprint for maximising potential and shattering your personal barriers.
Words of Wisdom
“Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance you must keep moving.”
– Albert Einstein